Bangkok

The Thais call their capital Krung Thep, or City of Angels.  It's an interesting choice of words given the hedonist atmosphere that pervades much of the city - the busy red light districts, the uber-malls that put Singapore to shame, the overwhelming number of massage parlors, the heavenly smell of curry boiling on the sidewalks, the x-rated t-shirts that would make a New Yorker blush, the 'wily strangers' on every block looking to con a quick buck (or "bhat").....

The cabs are colored like Tropical Skittles; the street markets are serenely hassle-free (are you listening, Vietnam?); the Thai boxing matches, with sweat, and occasionally blood, spraying in all directions, are thrilling and brutal; the rivers are filthy and god help you if you fall in, but they're the best way to navigate the city (I read somewhere that some consider Bangkok to be the "Venice of Asia," hmnnn); the Buddhist temples ("wats") are bathed in gold, jewels and colored glass that literally glow in mid-day sun.....

The locals will come up to you and pretend they're police, trying to con you; they will approach you 20x a day with brochures filled with naked women and say, "body massage?;" they will bow their heads, with their hands together to greet you and thank you each day; they will construct a soccer goal out of anything available; they will say "America" with an exclamation point; they will use their umbrellas on a clear day to block the sun (I did too); they will tell you their king is a "very good man" even if you didn't ask; mostly, they will just make you miss Bangkok.....

Goin' Country

I took a trip into the Singaporean countryside today.  I didn't even know there was such a thing...but apparently, there's a small rural community called Kranji in the northern part of the island.

Once I got off the train, I found a minibus nicknamed The Kranji Express, which stops at all the farms - and there are lots of them. Farms for fireflies, frogs, goats, koi, palm trees and the list goes on.  Mariah Carey's "Vision of Love" was blasting inside the bus, and the man next to me was trying to calm a live chicken he held in a grocery bag.  Ah, the country.

Thirty minutes later, I arrived at "Bollywood Veggies," which is run by a married couple, who I think were former hippies and now produce the largest source of organic papayas and bananas in the country.  As soon as I arrived, the staff handed me a faded black-and-white map of the farm and asked for the $2 entry fee.  The owner called out, "No entry fee for him.  He's a foreigner so give him a nice map."  And so I walked away $2 richer with a laminated color map in hand.  Not bad.

I donated the savings back to them at their Poison Ivy Cafe, where I sampled some home brewed aloe vera tea and sweet potato leaves with chili.  When I ordered, like a dummy, I asked, "Is that sweet potato?"  Waitor: "Nooo, it's the leaves.  It's a local favorite."  Anyway, it was very good and tasted a little like collard greens.  

And I topped it all off with some homemade banana bread, which was AMAZING.  Bought a half-loaf of it, got back aboard The Kranji Express, and went home. 

Signs Around Town

Here are some signs randomly found around town that I've grown to love.

From the traditional, "No Trespassing," to the more progressive "Aim Properly (when using a urinal),"which is sponsored by the National Environmental Agency no less, Singaporeans prove they have a great sense of humor.

Aloha!

What I overheard on the island of Oahu, Hawaii:

- "If people said 'Aloha' to each other more often, we wouldn't be in this mess we're in." (Aloha has 3 meanings - hello, g'bye, and I love you)

- "Bush?  Cheney? Those guys the devil.  What do I think about Obama?  Oh, he's great." Although I somewhat agree with the cab driver who told us this, it doesn't change the fact that he ended up being one crazy cabbie.

- "Ha-vie-ee."  This is the almost-German way the locals pronounce the state name.  Interesting. 

What I saw:  

-  Lots of very fashionable yet fully dressed Japanese girls strolling the streets.  I was surprised by how popular the islands were with the Japanese people.  Almost everything is written in English and Japanese. 

- The beautiful views of Waikiki and Honolulu from atop the Diamond Head Volcano

- Many senior citizens who fried their skin in the Hawaiian sun for too long

- Military tatooes everywhere: "Semper Fi, "In (insert Southern home state) We Trust" and the list goes on...

- The crystal clear water up close and personal as I wiped out countless times during surfing lessons from Hawaii's firefighters.  That's right, Hawaii's finest moonlight as surf instructors. I did stay up on the board quite a few times and will soon have the pictures to prove it.

- Local magazines highlighting "Obama's favorite things."  From the "shave ice," which is Hawaii's version of the mainland's snow cone, to a great restaurant called Alan Wong's, we sampled a good bit of the hometown hero's recommendations.

Can't wait to go back!